I may have mentioned before in these pages that I don’t watch TV. It’s great, you should try it. I do listen to the radio on occasion though, mainly in the car, but also in bed before lights out.

Radio 4 puts out a lot of so called comedy in the late evening. I use the word comedy very lightly, as, to be honest, the stuff never makes me laugh (or even smile!)

Now you might think I’m some old stick in the mud with no sense of humour, but you’d be wrong. I’m a Liverpudlian by birth, and we are know for our sharp dry wit and our ability to really laugh. It’s just that so called modern and usually alternative comedy just isn’t funny. A lot of the time they have to resort to smut, which is always the sign of a talentless comic. Let me elaborate…

When I was a lad I played in a group (didn’t have bands in those days). Every so often we would be booked to play at Jacobs Social club. Jacobs being the biscuit makers, a big employer in Liverpool at that time. They could afford to get some big name acts, (not us of course!). I saw Bert Weedon play there once, and boy, he could play. Still can by all accounts at almost 90. Way to go Bert!

Well, this one time we were there and Ken Dodd was on. He used to play Jacobs to try out his new material for Panto season. I remember, he had stuff written all over his hands as reminders. Any way, he went on and we were in stitches for an hour. I can clearly remember having real trouble breathing through laughing so much. Tears streamed down everyone’s faces and it was difficult to stay in your chair and not slide out… I kid you not, he was the funniest man I have ever seen, and not one word or thought was smutty. A man with real comedic talent who could make you laugh till your sides hurt.

So, what went wrong? Where have all the comedians gone? Where are the Ted Rays, the Arthur Askeys…All Liverpudlians by the way. We have Jimmy Tarbuck, another scouser. He’s a funny man. But there are precious few around.

Seems to me that the BBC, in trying to be ‘modern’ have lost the plot. Their comedy sucks, their afternoon plays can be disgusting, their stance on religion a joke, their politics biased.

I’m really glad they don’t get any of God’s money from me.

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